|–.–|

Back in the ink of thoughts.

Still colored obsidian.

But now textured incomplete licorice.

This ink is missing its current.

It has consciousness,

But that of one in a coma.

Stalling.

It's a safety net.

It's a hazardous trap.

It's warm and cool.

It's burning and biting.

It wants you to sleep

All day

And think all night.

But

Never rest.

It steals the light from eyes

And

Warps space into slow motion.

It keeps you existing

While never living.

Waking up is half the battle.

Escaping is the second half.

Remembering to move forward the war.

This isn't your artist's ink.

This is depression.

And it's only

One of its forms.

Double-Edged Sword

Pitter-patter. Pitter-patter.

Plop-plop.

Drip-drip.

Sprinkle me with mist.

Douse me in coolness.

Refresh this dry terrain.

Thromp-thromp.

Wrsh-crsh.

FROOMP.

Wash over me.

Crash into me.

Decimate this landscape.

Rain is funny like that.

Masquerade

You say I have your unconditional support.

I believe you.

You say you don't care in the end.

I believe you.

You tell me to tone it down.

I refuse.

You tell me I should be more normal.

I refuse.

You can't handle me.

You can't handle the person I am.

You can handle the me I'm going to create.

You can't handle me.

So here's to my masquerade.

Here's to my facade for you.

Here's to knowing what you want.

You'll think you know me.

You'll think you understand my interests.

You'll think you get it.

There will be things you don't know I do.

There will be things you'll never understand.

There will be things you don't deserve to know.

And that's okay.

One Coin Revised

Hatred.

The circumference.

The fuel.

Always aimed.

Anger.

Sadness.

Only the vehicles.

Only hatred's pawns.

All deceptive.

All cruel.

One coin.

Two sides.

Fuel to ignite them.

One Coin

Anger.

Sadness.

A jagged sea of spines.

A molasses of quicksand.

Projection.

Burial.

Maker of homicides.

Maker of suicides.

Both dark.

Both unforgiving.

Both undiscriminating.

Two sides.

One coin.

Treading

Where am I?

I'm submerged in liquid, all but my head.

Is it blood?

No.

Too gruesome

Not dreary enough.

I think I am in ink.

Ink black like obsidian,

Yet fluffy like flour.

And it has a current,

A shifting consciousness.

This ink is my thoughts.

Thoughts which are incoherent.

Thoughts which are more accurately called feelings.

More precisely, one feeling.

One feeling which I've experienced once before;

Only once.

In reaction to separation from her.

A close friend during middle school.

A sad little dead end trail.

This time it is for them.

A happy little trail with no end in sight.

And the ink threatens to drown my mind.

It makes my skin prickle

And my stomach buzz from electricity.

And it threatens to slip through my eyes.

But still I like it.

Because I like the reason it exists.

Stranger Like Me

We are the same.

And

We are different.

You exist.

I exist.

You are 2D and 3D.

I am only 3D.

We both have a temper.

We both learned to deal.

We both utilize motion to control.

You can talk.

You can hear.

I can speak.

I can listen.

We are both dangerous.

We both strive to master our potential.

You have killed.

I believe I could kill.

We are both humans.

But 

You are a woman

And

I am a person...

Yet

We are both girls and both reject norms.

We both have a hard exterior.

And few truly know us.

But you can never think for yourself

While I will always grow my mind.

We are the same

And

We are different

Because

You are a character

And

I am real.

Premature

Pressure.

An itch.

A barrier.

You hold out.

You look through the jumble.

You cave.

Your ink is blotting.

Your paint is caking.

Your graphite is chipping.

You had to try.

You gave it your best.

You worked in the moment.

But the itch is only worse.

The pressure persists.

The barrier grows into a wall.

Manifest

It's a presence.

It's a feeling.

It's a phantom.

It turns to vapor.

It becomes tangible.

It remains uncatchable.

It sits as dead weight.

It bides time.

It idles in the corner.

You least expect it.

You are vulnerable.

You let your guard down.

Then -

It's a blazing fire.

It's a thousand needles.

It's a hurricane.

It is real.

Dream A Dream

Look out into the horizon.

Let's pretend we can plan ahead.

Lie next to me in the future like we imagine.

Reality.

Look out into the horizon.

We're alone together, You and I.

Take my hand, but in your dreams.

Because we're apart, You and I.

Remember.

The days when we were together.

The pictures and the shenanigans.

Some day we'll be back together.

We'll make it through

The summer.

Keep finding me in my daydreams.

Keep following me into my sleep.

Keep falling for me as I fall for you.

Closure

Meet me where I am.

I'll meet you where you're at.

See me.

I'll see you.

Tell me about college.

Tell me about yourself.

Tell me about history.

I'll share my experience.

I'll share my thoughts.

I'll show you history.

Our perspectives will never align.

Our past is complicated. 

Our futures do not cross paths.

But thank you for meeting me.

But thank you for hearing me.

But thank you for seeing me.

I do not know what to think of you.

But I can call you friend again.

Never Learn

Guess I'll just repeat my mistake again.

JM 2.1?

Whatever the case, same concept.

<Go die in a hole>

No I don't think that's advisable.

<Run away>

Yeah, like solved anyone's problems.

<Get fuck out then.>

Uh...no way in hell.

Curiosity killed the cat?

I must be the cat then.

Questions are not always my friend.

I'll just sit here.

Sit here and feel like a snitch.

Or maybe just a sneak.

Lines are draw to be avoided.

I crossed the line.

And I'm sorry.

The Place Where the Sky is the Limit

Party night.

Not for me.

I make my own entertainment.

No fear.

Only curiosity.

Always adventure.

No lights.

Only balance.

Always caution.

Come friend.

Come friend supervise me.

Supervise me in this endeavor.

It is black all around me.

My friend can no longer see me.

I am alone.

I am in peace here.

I hide in a shadow.

I look out upon the tower.

Its lights shine bright against the ink sky.

It is a beacon.

I wish to stay here.

I wish to sink into this solitary world.

I wish to lie watching the stars.

~If only you could've been there.~

~If only you could get there.~

~If only we could share that place.~

The place where the sky is the limit.

Triad (2)

<Well... You got the third input.>

<Happy?>

No.

I need it from the source to count in full.

I can only take that with a grain of salt.

It's okay though.

Things seem to be settled.

For now.

<Keep your guard.>

<Stability tends to be unstable here.>

Triad

If this goes bad...it might go REALLY bad...

But hey, let's hope for the best.

<I remember saying that.>

Now it has gone bad.

<How much?>

I don't know.

I only have 2/3 of the picture.

<What makes up those thirds?>

1/3 His perspective.

1/3 my observations of the other.

I need the final 1/3.

<Then ask for it.>

<It's as simple as that.>

<But first...>

<Why do you need the whole picture?>

For my own satisfaction,

So I can make informed decisions,

So I can reassure/guide him,

Because I won't make final judgment before knowing all sides.

<But do you actually need the information?>

<Does he want you to get it?>

<Will getting it help or hurt?>

<What will you do if the information gives more distress than comfort?>

I need the final 1/3.

<But do you actually?>