Electrified

Too much energy.

Too much energy to know what to do.

Too much to know how to think.

I can't think straight.

I can't straighten out my feelings.

I can't feel out my intensity.

I wish you were around.

I wish you were around to hold me.

I wish your grip were here to put me to sleep.

Please be able to handle it.

Please be able to open it.

Please be able to control it.

Strung on a live wire...

Clipped by a thread...

Balancing on a razor blade...

Let me jump.

Let me fall.

Let me cut away.

<Stop it>

<Get a grip on yourself.>

<Find some patience.>

<Cut it out.>

Fine.

You always shut me down.

<You always need shut up.>

Motionless

I miss it.

It's been a week.

I crave it.

I've been stuck laying around.

At first it was fine, relaxing even.

But now it's grueling.

At first it was boredom.

All I had to do was entertain myself.

It was only stagnation.

But now...

It's an itch.

It's the tightness in my body.

It's boiling electricity in my veins.

It has to be released.

It can be stagnant no more.

The Twilight Zone

*First stanza and each first line written before going under, the rest was done about ten minutes after waking up.

It's said to be...

Semi consciousness.

You don't remember.

Like sleeping, but not exactly.

It's actually...

Something like a nap.

You don't remember the actual surgery.

It's a bit like a nap.

The aftermath...

Fine motor skills are normal.

Major motor skills are sub par.

You might just be tipsy.

It feels like your moving in slow motion.

Really you just want to sleep some more.

Needless Nerves

Waiting.

Need to kill time. Need to calm excitement.

Sitting in front of light, watching explosions;

It works for some time.

But as the clock ticks that excitement freezes into nervous itch.

Sweaty palms and heat in my face.

What will I say after the story?

[Why do I need a story to start a conversation?]

So I distract myself with string.

I hook organization from chaos.

Gives myself something concrete to see.

But then it's time.

And it's so simple.

Words come <smooth as butter>.

Nerves fall away and leave content.

It was only in my head.

Without even trying, we are intertwining.